Tuesday, November 13, 2012


We realized that having a baby & adopting an infant would be like raising twins. We recognized long ago that we were embarking on a journey that was too big for us. We gave up early & waved the white flag of surrender to the truth that if God was calling us to this He would have to provide the strength, patience, money, love, organization... our everything.

What i didn't realize, nor properly prepare for, was being asked by multiple strangers every time we entered the public realm "Are they twins?"

i'm at a loss... What do i respond? i mean according to Siri (yes... i just asked my phone) Twins are "two offspring borne in a single pregnancy". (Is that how you spell born? Is the "e" necessary? Is Siri thinking of the action movies?) Therefore Maverick & Theo aren't truly twins. i don't want to deceive these sweet strangers who are deeply concerned about the make up of my family... neither do i want to explain from here on out "the pale one i bore from my womb & the tan one came from out of state."

They're both my babies... & always will be. i don't want to start out differentiating between them. The thought that they won't bond as brothers worries me. i fear Theo feeling second-rate or left out. These are things i have to regularly give to God & ask Him to guard my heart against worrying about. Therefore explaining the difference between them multiple times a day is not what i want to be doing... also it's long & we already covered the fact that i'm lost in the grocery store as is.

So here are some alternate answers i've come up with for the question "Are they twins?"

They're a tag-team... Each other's stunt double... They're roommates... Synchronized siblings... "i'm not sure, the stork didn't specify"... They're awesome... Milk sharers... The dynamic duo... They're party poopers... Copycats... Future tennis partners... They're best brothers... They're hungry... Non-biological twins...

That's all i can come up with right now. i'd love to hear any of your suggestions for how to best answer this question. But until it's settled (in a hopefully honest & clever & quick statement) i'll just continue to soak up the amazingness of being the mom of two amazing babies at the same time & share our story with whoever is interested.


  1. Daniel and Sarah get asked if they are twins, especially when they are in the double stroller. I'm not sure how to answer that question other than are you crazy? Look at them. Hah, just kidding!

    They are both mine might be a good answer. I was super woman and had two babies 2 months apart.

    Hah, I'd be one to be honest and say "no. Let them wonder. Wait for the next question. The non-biological twins is what you're sticking to? Then I would go with that answer. You are carrying two carriers around so you'll get lots of twin questions. I wonder if that will change when they start toddling or you'll continue to get stranger questions...get it.. stranger..questions!

  2. I think non-biological twins is the simplest response. By the time they noodle that one through, you will have moved on. (Most people will probably then ask, "Does that mean they don't look alike?")

    You carried Theo in your heart while you carried Maverick in your womb. Close enough!!

  3. Non identical twins would work for me.

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  5. I think saying you adopted your "son Theo" after having your "son Maverick" is safe. Non biological just is going to start more questions. It's cute, but confusing. I know I would ask what do you mean by that? I was confused for a few days on facebook until you explained it. Tip toeing around the word adoption I don't think is helping anything. Your proud to of adopted him and make him family. He will know that as he learns and grows older. He doesn't even know where his nose is yet. I think its safe to say your over thinking this one. If you make it a big deal so will everyone else. They are babies growing up together side by side. They are best friends and brothers no doubt in that. Easier to explain that growing up than learning you were adopted after a certain age a feeling lied to and going though hurt and anger. I don't know though I'm not a parent yet. Doesn't the adoption agency have parenting advice on these kinds of issues?