Thursday, November 19, 2015

Random Things That Stress Me Out

People Running in Denim
Is someone chasing them? They seem to be at a relaxed jogging pace, but they're wearing jeans... Even when the person is clearly participating in the same 5k as me, but she's in denim shorts, my heart races faster. Chaffing much?

The Pressure of Picking the Exact Correct Size Tupperware for Leftovers 
I can't handle a big ol' plastic container with an insufficient amount of food to fill it. Enough so that I'll actually risk the smaller size with the possibility of realizing it's a scoop too small. This, of course, is way worse as now you're talking an extra dirty dish and another gamble in the Tupperware drawer... Aye aye aye...

Kids Not Sleeping
It doesn't just apply to my own minions. I worry about the melt downs strangers are going to have the next day if they're still shopping at Walmart two hours after I put mine to bed. The possible tantrums and lack of self control that I won't even be around to witness make my stomach tight. I just want these strange kids to succeed at life through appropriate bedtimes!!!

The Mixing of Athletic Pants with Dress Shirts
Could you not decide? If you want to play a sport, you will clearly ruin that shirt with sweat. If you want to lounge around, you will clearly be hindered from comfort by the collars and buttons. And what is the appropriate type of shoe to wear with an outfit like that?

Public Speakers Who Say "Just a Few More Things" as They Near Their Ending Time
How many is a "few"? Is each point going to take as long as the first few you just spent your lecture time making? Even if they're good points and I'm am without a pressing appointment I start to doubt my ears abilities. 

Loafers Without Socks
I've worn loafers. How is this a thing? You're definitely getting blisters in those stiff, stuffy dress shoes. Your feet must be swimming in sweat to the point that they're sliding around inside there... Gag!!!

Messes in Movies
Someone is going to have to clean that up! I'm glad Kevin bested the robbers, but it's possible he did more property damage than the family who left him alone would've lost to the theft. The only good part of the movie Jumanji is the moment when they finish the game and everything goes back to normal magically...

Guys in Their 20's Who Grow Mustaches 
I automatically assume you grew it as a joke. Then the gracious Holy Spirit reminds me that there are all sorts of opinions other than my own. But I don't know how to proceed (and assume you don't either). I panic. I just wish I knew if you were as serious about your facial hair decisions as men in their thirties...

Live Orchestra Performances
I've played in my share of symphonic winds concerts. I appreciate classical type music in certain settings. I recognize the skill and discipline and grace these symphonies require... I just wish someone was singing or dancing or acting something out to the beautiful music. More sophisticated people will (and should) totally disagree with me on this. But it's not even a boredom thing... I'm just anxious because I don't know how long all these songs in the program are, or even what song we're currently enjoying... and I'm severely doubting my sitting still skills are enough to last this (that ability is sadly underdeveloped in my person)!!!

Not Knowing Where the Facilities Are
I don't need to know exactly where the bathroom is. I possess a grown up amount of bladder control. But if I'm out somewhere and need to find a bathroom... I'm in trouble. If I know where it is and how to get there, I'll make it. If there is an ounce of doubt... Let's just say if I don't know where I'm going, I'll just go where I am...

Figuring Out How To End Blogs