The Depths of Forgiveness

how deep am i willing to dive into forgiveness?

some days i feel i've already treaded as deep as i can go...

yet i feel the Holy Spirit pushing me... prodding me to swim deeper

into waters unknown to me

... waters that Christ walks on...

for He has already been into the deep... fully submerged

only to resurface with a full victory...

of complete forgiveness

for all people

for every sin.

... even those we can't bear without terror

& He's there in that abyss of forgiveness calling

"follow Me"...

but the waves are crashing in my fearful mind, 

& the thunder of my broken heart is deafening,

the pain is crying louder than His still, small voice...

in the breath of the moment i'm incredibly aware that i have a choice

a hard choice

a painful choice

to either allow my eyes to be captured by the turmoil

the heart ache

the terror

or...

to fix my gaze on Jesus

Who is not thrown by the storm

or tossed by the waves of fear

Who knows the pain of this offense personally

for He Himself bore the consequences of this sin

with full knowledge of this betrayal 

He was pleased to make the offender His own...

if i choose to stop here

because i've already gone so far

or don't know how to go further...

then i'll drown in my unforgiveness.

but if i move forward

forgiving as Christ forgives

then i'm running toward His open arms

& that voice that stills the storm

... & if for only that reason

forgiveness is not the ignorant choice

& we should never mistake the peace of Jesus in the storm 

for a lack of knowledge of severity

or an absence of caring...

for it is the new way to true life

Isaiah 43... "forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. see, I am doing a new thing! now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert & streams in the wasteland... I, even I, am He who blots out your transgressions, for My own sake, & remembers your sins no more..."