Wednesday, October 23, 2013

It's Not a Competition

Let's just stop.
Stop the comparing, measuring, devaluing, hiding, nagging, judging, punishing, berating...
After we are done with all that... let's begin to deal with how we treat others.

For, while i do not know about you, the meanest things i say each day are not heard by another person. i actually probably wouldn't speak to an enemy the way that i speak to myself...
(Please feel free to comment below if you are an enemy of mine and have an opinion about this.)

For what is it benefiting us? Does anyone have some amazing story of freedom and victory that has emerged from your harsh, hate-filled view in which you see yourself? Is someone's life better from always measuring themselves against others? (Again, please share in the comment section if this is your experience.)

Because it's not working for me. There's always someone prettier, faster, more artistic, a better writer, more natural of a mom, stronger, more in love with Jesus, smarter, more creative, a better cook, funnier, more patient... than i have deemed myself to be. i try harder... but just find myself more tired and anxious. Whatever "improvements" i'm actually able to make i both refuse to accept and grow intensely terrified of losing.

All of this over invisible competitions where i participate as creator, competitor, trainer, coach, judge, and the sole spectator. Never the winner.

So let me be brave enough to state these simple, logical truths...

Pain is pain.
There is no standard of physical beauty to which we all fall on the sliding scale of...
A good dancer enjoys moving to music uninhibited by fear of those who may be watching...
A child's behavior in a moment does not define that parent...
Accomplishment is not relative. If you struggled through a challenge and did not succumb then you should celebrate...
Labor is hard.
Fear sounds terrible in a singing voice...
We get only one body. Hatred and wrong treatment of this body is to no good end...
Trying and failing is a vital part of growth...
Mirrors lie...
The beauty, talent, ability, etc of someone else does not fade your beauty, talent, ability or life...
Babies grow and develop at different rates...
Discipline determines how you will react... it does not take away the child's choice to misbehave...
Loss hurts.
The differences in trees make the forest gorgeous...
Marriage is two imperfect people being joined into one huge mess of a family...
No one can control when or how a baby grows, rolls, talks, gets teeth, walks, pees in a potty...
Tired is tired.
Running only for first place will leave you disappointed...
Doing more than you did before is an accomplishment...
Feeling fear is a necessary part of having courage...
Grades that your child brings home do not reflect your intelligence...
Your spouse can see your faults as clearly as marriage shows you theirs...
Clean does not keep...
Parenting is gut wrenching...
Even the models don't look like the pictures in the magazines...
You can't be a good enough athlete, student, or christian to make your offspring into the same...
Art is defined by each individual...
Keeping going through what is hard is strength...
Someone has it worse... this does not diminish our need to deal with the hardships in our lives...
Someone has it better... this does not diminish the joy we should celebrate in our lives...
Perfection is not an option.

Let's all breathe that in for a minute. Let's strive to silence the voice of lies that constantly whisper in our ears and scream at us from society. Let's refuse to continue needing to be the most injured, the most tired, the most perfect in order to feel justified in being who we are.

Let us stop... but not be so foolish to think we can change in our own power. i'm committing to listen to the One who is Creator, and Judge, and Perfect... and actually accepting what He says about me.
For God has called me
loved (1 John 4:19)
precious (Isaiah 43:4)
beautiful (Psalm 45:11)
shinny (Phil 2:15)
imagined (Jer. 1:5)
forgiven (Isaiah 1:5)
empowered (Colossians 1:11)
desired (Psalm 45:11)
royal (1 Peter 2:9)
treasured (Deuteronomy 26:18)
His (Isaiah 43:1)...
What imaginary title could i possibly earn that would satisfy more than these? Why would i choose to keep striving on my own against those around me? i want to claim the victory of peace with God so that i can claim that same peace with myself and watch the competitions disappear around me
into true relationships.

1 comment:

  1. Oh kimmy we were ever on the same page today. I am tired of the run around in my own head. We all see ourselves as less that we are and we seem to aspire to be something we are not. I was fearfully and wonderfully made and yet I seem to have changed that to I am fearful of what I am. I mess up yes but I am tired of my failures becoming who I am in my own mind. I want to start living out of the success that God has accomplished in me and look forward to the many more He has in store. Thank you for affirming what God was speaking to me today and I am grateful he has spoken it to you as well. We are blessed.

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